Who Am I?

The Official Story

Danny Zeff was born in a log cabin in Canada on a cold wintery day. A myth reveals that four wise guys visited him while he went to Taco Bell for the first time, but the truth of this myth is unknown. Danny has real parents but prefers to be raised by coffee-drinking sea otters. He usually wears contacts, but he always keeps a pair of glasses with him to help avoid mongooses from attacking his manliness. A fortune teller once predicted that he will bleed to death on an elevator due to a massive paper cut on his middle finger on his right hand. However Danny has ignored this highly specific prediction and continues to live both a carpe diem and a laissez faire way of life.

The Unofficial Story

Daniel (Danny) Joseph Zeff was born on June 3, 1991. He was born in San Francisco, California. At two years old, he moved to Columbus, Georgia. At six years old, he moved to El Paso, Texas. At fourteen years old, he moved to Sacramento, California, where he attended Mira Loma High School and earned an Associates certificate in the International Baccaloureate program. As of fall 2009, he attends Chapman University in Orange, California, where he is studying to earn a BFA in Film Production with a Holocaust History minor. His hobbies include filmmaking, writing, theatre, tennis, guitar, and people watching.

Who He is Not

Danny Zeff is not the same Dan Zeff that sells guitars online. While he does play guitar among other instruments, he does not sell any.

He is also not the Dan Zeff that wrote an episode of Dr. Who. He almost wishes he was though.

He is also not a photo supply service. If you want to hire him for a movie, however, now we’re talking.

Nor is he a designer. Do you realize how complicated it was for him just to set up this website?

Nor is he a memorial library about enthogens. What the hell are enthogens?

And just to clarify, his name is not Tova Zeff. He is not an attorney at law. If you hire him for your legal battles, you will not win.

Nor is his name Stephen Zeff. He is not a professor of accounting. Don’t make that Jewish stereotype.

Nor is his name Leo Zeff. He is not a psychologist or psychotherapist. And he is definitely not the Johnny Appleseed of MDMA. Apples are delicious, however.

Nor is his name Richard Zeff. He is not a cosmetic plastic surgeon.

And then he is not quite sure what his relationship is with effective nuclear charge. We’ll just let that one go for now…