More reasons to... 
DO NOT MIX UP FAIRY TALES

by Danny Zeff

Welcome back to story hour.

Here is another tale

About mixing up those fantasy creatures.

This story will not fail.

I have more reasons to tell you

Not to mix up books

Or else Mother Goose might get angry

And hang you by a hook.

Humpty Dumpty was an egg.

You can tell he had no fear

Because one day he sat on a wall

Where the ground was not near.

Unfortunately one day,

While he was on the wall,

Something bad happened to the Egg:

Humpty Dumpty started to fall.

And then a king named Midas

Looked at this cracked egg.

He tried to fix it with his men and horses,

But those guys couldn’t even attach Humpty’s leg.

King Midas looked at Humpty’s yoak,

Admiring the gold.

So Midas decided to find a genie,

To be granted a wish as told.

Midas went inside a cave

Where he found a magic lamp.

He rubbed it once, he rubbed it twice,

But the oustide still seemed damp.

Then up appeared a genie

Which said, “I’ll give you three wishes.

I’ll grant them without even needing a wand

That makes those annoying swishes.

Then Midas said, “I wish

Everything I touched turned gold.

It can be books. It can be lamps.

It can even be mold.”

The next day Midas saw,

That everything he touched was gold.

For example, once he touched paper,

That paper could not fold.

Midas realized that

He could not eat his golden food.

So he said to his genie,

“Now I don’t mean to be rude,

But my first wish didn’t

Turn out as I planned.

So I wish that my first wish

Could be erased, if you can.”

The genie did his job,

And Midas was regular again.

Then he decided he needed a son

To become king after him.

So as Midas’s last wish,

He wished for a son.

But when the prince became eighteen,

He told his father something was wrong.

He said, “I’ll need a wife

So I can have a queen.”

Midas said, “Your queen will be a princess

That can feel – under many mattresses – a bean.”

Many princesses tried,

But obviously there was no luck.

But one day a girl could feel the pea.

Her name was Goldilocks.

Queen Goldilocks decided

To take a walk one day.

She journeyed into a house

That looked deserted all the way.

The house had some porridge

And a jar of honey.

Goldilocks tasted the soup.

She thought it tasted funny.

So she decided to go to bed,

In a bed that was rather small.

The only problem was

Goldilocks was very tall.

So then she found a chair

And slept in that instead.

But then came in a bear

Who just finished a slice of bread.

But the bear was only stuffed

Because his named was Winnie-the-Pooh.

But Pooh is owned by Disney.

What does that mean to you?

It means not to mix up fairy tales

Or it will be nonsense, my friend.

I guess we’ll end this odd poem

With two short words: THE END!

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